There was once when I thought I had everything, all rosy and happy. Everyone and everything was that fine, that natural, that good.
Then it occurred to me that I’ve been taking everything for granted. I assumed everything and everyone would be the same as they were; change would be superfluous. But little did I know that they have been changing under my nose. When I stopped to think and get a breather from work, I was swamped by the magnitude of changes I received. Since when has it been like this? Did I really do that and expect others to do the same too? Is it still going to be like this in the future? These questions have been swirling around in my mind recently.
My friend once said that he hoped he will never see updates on my blog here, because I only write when I’m upset. I never write when I experienced something joyful, or never update on my daily life. Friends whom I don’t keep in touch that often only get to see the troubles and desperation I face whenever they see entries on my blog. Hence, the side of me they see has always been one of depression and sadness. It got to a point when now my friends of old are asking me if everything is all right with my life. Yes, everything is ok in my life right now. I cannot complain about the fact that I’m being paid to study. I cannot feel sad about not being able to buy what I want since I’m being paid a salary now. In fact, there is little to complain about my life now. Everything is just as it is: stable, peaceful, quiet.
Things happen, and things happen. I know that I have to come to a decision, and soon at that. But right now, procrastination is sinking in because of particular factors that are under consideration. I have to do another round of thinking soon, and this time, I cannot delay anymore. Things have to be settled.
